In this post, Tom Richens writes about his diagnosis and treatment for testicular cancer, and how he’s chosen to celebrate long-term remission.
The 8th of August 2008 is an easy date to remember due to its symmetry. It is also a date that I will never forget: the date that I was diagnosed with testicular cancer. I was 29 years old. Deep down I knew that something had been wrong for a long time, but I kept convincing myself that everything was OK. I had felt a persistent dull ache in my right testicle, but there were other symptoms too. I experienced acute back and abdominal pain, then fatigue. Eventually, my right testicle was excruciatingly painful and about twice the size of my left one. I went to see my GP. He immediately sent me to hospital to undergo an ultrasound, and by the end of that day I had my diagnosis confirmed: a malignant teratoma of my right testicle. The testicle had been taken over completely by the tumour.
My right testicle was removed via an orchidectomy. I was offered a prosthesis but I declined due to the increased risk of infection. As it was, I got an infection anyway. The orchidectomy was a success and the tumour markers looked clear, which was a good sign that the tumour hadn’t spread. I had been incredibly lucky.
I was referred to a clinical oncologist, who set out my options for further treatment. If I had chemotherapy there would be about 2% chance of the cancer coming back, and I would need regular check-ups for five years. If I didn’t have chemo there would be about 40% chance of the cancer returning, and I would need to have tests every two weeks for five years. There really was not a choice to be had, so I agreed to have chemotherapy.
I was put on the BEP chemotherapy regime. My treatment started on the 14th of October 2008, my wife’s birthday. Never let it be said that I don’t know how to show her a good time! Initially I experienced very few side effects, but within a short space of time I began to lose my hair and the treatment became quite debilitating. I had no energy at all and would generally alternate between sleeping and being sick. . I craved burnt and bland food – very strange for someone who has always been a great food lover.
I was relieved when I finished my treatment. However, I’d be lying if I said that I didn’t have other, less positive emotions. Anxiety that the cancer would come back was there all the time. What if that meant losing my other testicle? Deep down, I also felt a sense of insecurity as a result of the treatment. I didn’t find this easy to acknowledge at the time. Eventually I went to see a counsellor, and this proved to be really helpful. I could open up about what having cancer had really meant to me. I would say to anyone: it is no shame to feel insecure, anxious, or even angry. Talking about it is not a sign of weakness, but actually a sign of great strength. I know that as blokes, we don’t like doing that!
I had regular check-up appointments for five years: first at three-monthly intervals and then less frequently, until I was seen on a yearly basis. There were always nerves before my appointments, but I knew that the medical staff would pick up anything sinister. After a few minor bumps in the road, after five years I was officially discharged. It was a fantastic feeling, and time for the celebrations to start!
I always felt that it was really important to mark key milestones in my remission. My wife, my step-children and I enjoyed a fabulous holiday to Egypt in 2009 to mark one year of being ‘all-clear’. We probably wouldn’t have gone if it weren’t for what had happened the previous year, and we had a terrific time. They deserved it more than I did really, as their love and support throughout my treatment was amazing. When I was discharged after five years, we had a great night celebrating, and then my wife and I took a spa break at a beautiful hotel in the Cotswolds. Finally, as this year marks ten years since my cancer diagnosis, I have decided to embark on a photo shoot. I have never been a particularly self-confident guy, but the photoshoot really represented how far I had come and I got progressively braver as the shoot went on! I could never have imagined that I would have been brave enough to do something like this, so it really was a final piece of closure.
I often get asked if having cancer changed me. Overall, I would say I am the same person as I was ten years ago, but there are certainly some subtle changes and lessons I have taken on board. I still worry about work at times, but I always make far more of an effort to ensure family and friends come first. Having cancer gave me the impetus to do things that I would never have considered previously. I organised a charity cricket match in 2010 that raised approximately £5000 for Cancer Research UK. It took eight months of hard planning but when it all came together it was a fabulous day. I also ran the London Marathon in 2016 to raise money for the same charity. It was damn hard work, but the most wonderful and rewarding experience. I would never have considered it had I not had such a burning desire to give something back after my own cancer experience.
As a cancer survivor you will never forget your diagnosis or treatment. However, I think that it is important to look forward in life. For me, the raw emotion of having cancer has subsided over time. I would never say that I was lucky because getting cancer isn’t lucky but today, life as a survivor is pretty damn good. Value every day and enjoy life.
The photos of Tom Richens were taken by Khandie Photography, and are reproduced here with permission from the photographer.
Website – www.KhandiePhotography.com
Facebook – www.facebook.com/KhandiePhotography